Keeping it Simple

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Sometimes when I talk to Father, I get into ruts. One of my big ruts last year was a desperate (almost whiny) monologue going something like this…. "Father, I'm so hungry. I'm desperate for you to reveal Yourself to me. I'm stuck. I need MORE. I need something today that takes away 
this doubt and this unrest."  I didn't think about it as whining at the time, because I was very sincere. I guess there is such a thing as a "sincerely whiny" prayer, because I seemed to nail it.

By the end of the year, my whiny-ness turned into a more blatant and honest frustration with God for this never ending hunger issue that was repeatedly being ignored. I felt everyone else around me was advancing to more intense spirituality, and I was growing stagnant and stuck. When I finally told Father I was sick of asking, that's when things started getting a little clearer.
I was obviously missing something key here. And most likely praying wrong.

It never came to me all at one time, but I've reached some conclusions. It’s not that my hunger is just a whiny misplaced fuss, it's that I've completely been disregarding the fact that 
God   Already   Is.

If I can imagine for a minute God telling me like it is... here is His response.

“Your desire was not as whiny as you think. It was important that you recognized over and over that intimacy is not something you could create on your own. You were coming to me for help instead of trying to fix it on your own. You've made steps in that area. I mean, hey - remember how you used to believe that increased devotion and diligence will make you feel close to Me?
You've gained ground, love. You've gained ground.

 The problem this time around was that you got it in your head that there was something I 
was withholding from you. But this is no iPhone game, love. There are no levels and 
no unlocking needed. I'm already here, you already know Me. Trust me to satisfy 
you always, and beg no more. It's actually about focusing on what you 
already possess (ME) - not what you think you lack (MORE OF ME).
Its. That. Simple.

I heard all your prayers, and it would have been fun to respond with amazing signs and wonders of my presence. But I knew that it wasn't for your good. The only thing that will create peace and satisfaction in you is by believing in My never-changing affection and My constant presence.
So believe away.

·         Believe with absolute certainty that if I were to withhold something from you, that it would only be in your absolute best interests.
·         Believe that I haven't forgotten you or abandoned you.
·         Believe that I am enough for today. And tomorrow. And the future that you insist on being anxiously obsessed about.
·         Believe that I am not waiting to interact with you until your motives are right, or you pray desperately enough.
·         Believe that I am hearing every word, and that I’m responding, even if your ears and eyes are untrained at times.
·         Most of all, believe in the bigger picture that you cannot see.

·         Believe in Me, and enjoy the peace like none other. 

Comments

  1. KatrinaApril 4, 2015 at 8:13 AM

    Ahh now you've made me cry at work. But this is so beautiful, Gloria. It touched a whole lotta raw places. Thank you for blogging again :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousApril 6, 2015 at 7:45 AM

    Yes. This! Thank you for letting Father speak through your heart and into my life. I needed this, in a big way. You're awesome & I love you. :) Kenj

    ReplyDelete

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